The Good News.

I've been in communication with a friend of mine who, having described to me the frustration lately of not going to church in a number of months, and being faced with the prospect of returning, has been plagued with the foreknowledge of the impending guilt shame and judgment that awaits her should she return.

This is what I wrote to her:

I can't tell you how much or how often I've had similar thoughts, feelings and fears as those you describe above.
There is one great freeing thing I learned from Africa, and I've been trying to share it with people in some capacity since; it's the piece of the puzzle that we, those who have grown up in the church, struggling all of our lives to meet some standard of behavior, ever-cognizant of the unspoken judgments that abound in the hearts of people, especially in the church, are the first to miss, or overlook, in the constant barrage of sin-conscious theology that we're inundated with for years: I know its something we hear, but it's so little in comparison to everything else that it takes a quietness of the other things, which you can find in bars and clubs when you realize that they satisfy nothing of your needs and you retreat into what you know to find the still small voice that says you are loved, Jesus loves you, you learned to love him, and none of the thoughts or judgments of man mean anything in that perfect truth that is the most clear depiction of grace you will ever know because its easy to see in our darkest hour that we don't deserve the love we were given, but there it is.
I didn't learn this through a lot of prayer, fasting, worship, or any of the other regulatory church activities. I learned this because I was in the midst of running away from everything, at the end of my rope, quite ready to give up, and then this hope was manifest, not through people, and still I often wish I could find that person to help me understand the deeper elements I've yet to delve, but through the simple revelation that this is true; I finally learned the thing I'd heard countless times before, and better yet, I understood: It is finished.
There in no work yet required for our salvation. Sin does not matter. The failings and judgments of other people does not matter. There is nothing in life worthy of our fears except God, and God doesn't deserve it, outside of the awe our love merits. Nothing we do, say or become can separate us from the love of God because Jesus made a bridge, and if you accepted Jesus into your life, you have a way back to the love you need at any time, even in the darkest place, when it seems too late, you can turn around to see the outstretched arms of that loving grace welcoming you back to life.
There's a whole community of professing Christians who are trying their best to live outside of the institutional churches, in hopes of finding the true fellowship of like-minded believers, to live according to the simplicity of the good news that God loves us, Christ died for us, Christ lives in us, so how can we better serve Christ, who accomplishes all that we cannot in our strength do, who has done all that needs to be done to reconcile ourselves to our Creator, loving God, loving one another?
Just be willing to listen and serve. That is all we need to do. Listen. Serve. Love.

PS: Sorry if its not what you expected or wanted in reply... it just sort of came out in typing. It's as much for me as you because I'm still alone and apt to wander in my desire not to be so, but grace has kept me where I am. I'm just trying my best to do the few little things I'm in place to do in service... and in love. So far, my peace is undisturbed.

- TPS